There used to be a staff in my work place who would constantly get in discord with someone or the other. At the smallest of reasons, quarrel would start between that person and other staff members or even patients. At the drop of a hat loud arguments used to start and the situations used to become overtly unpleasant for everyone. She claimed everyone is her enemy and is plotting against her. She was always bitter in her attitude.
My son came home agitated from school. He had been in a fight with one of his classmates. As he narrated his story, he told me, “mumma that kid is my biggest enemy. I will surely set him right” he said. Little children do not understand who our enemies really are. I hugged him and told him, we do not create enemies, you have to sort this amicably.
It set me thinking, if we have to choose our biggest enemy who will it be. People often in their hearts hold grudges against someone or the other, in their minds they feel those certain individuals are their foes. You often are bitter and angry against the actions of those persons. You feel resentful and hurt and keep on loosing your temper over the same. Even the smallest acts seem to trigger waves of anger in you and in your minds dwell negative feelings. Who is your biggest enemy? Is it an individual? Can you point out at one thing and label it your enemy?
The biggest enemy of any individual is anger. What causes anger? It’s our ego. So actually our biggest foe is ego. That’s what makes us believe we are superior, that’s what Instills In us a feeling of intolerance towards fellow beings , that’s what compels us to look down upon those surrounding us. That’s what creates in our hearts hatred and other negative feelings. Our big egos make us big in our heads , we feel like Goliath, rest everyone seems tiny. And hence the most trivial of argument or even differences of opinion become big fights. We are so sure we are always right courtesy our over bloated egos that just the suggestion that we might actually be wrong makes us swamped with ill feelings towards others. We fight tooth and nail to satisfy our ego and prove the other people wrong. We are full of rage. We are angry. The only way to defeat this enemy of anger is to deflate your big ego and come to understand that every other individual is also equally entitled to an opinion and the right to express that freely. If someone points a fault in you he or she is not your enemy. You will be your own enemy if you become blinded by ego and then anger and just create chaos in all situations which can be handled calmly
Start today by Killing your enemy . Your anger is the most important thing that you need to eradicate from your personality and that can only happen if you control your ego. The loss that one faces because of bad attitude is beyond comprehension. To bend at times does not make you a lesser person. In fact if escalates you mentally and emotionally to a much higher level. To let go is not easy but it’s the best way forward. To hold grudges against each other , to be bitter, to quarrel, to go to earth’s end to prove you are right are only self destructive. Do not create external enemies because of your internal foes. Create love and happiness for other as well as yourself and turn this world into a better place.
About author of the blog – Dr Riccha Sarin is a doctor working in the government sector. She writes on motivational blog and stories revolving around her every day interactions, patients and experiences, connecting their implications on life